


the adventures of slut shorts in texting land

by wow_im_satan



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-29
Updated: 2019-01-29
Packaged: 2019-10-18 21:45:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 766
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17589011
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wow_im_satan/pseuds/wow_im_satan
Summary: It’s a black butler chat fic with significantly longer chapters than my BNHA one. Alois is... well alois. Sebastian is done with everything. Ciel is also done with everything.





	the adventures of slut shorts in texting land

Alois: guess what i did today~  
Ciel: shut up slut shorts  
Alois: :,(   
Alois: they aren’t slutty  
Alois: theyre STYLISH   
Alois: claude back me up here   
Claude: Your shorts are beautiful   
Claude: Queen  
Claude: You look amazing  
Alois: dont spam the chat claude   
Ciel: lol  
Ciel: sebastian would never   
Ciel: fuc u claude   
Sebastian: >:3  
Bard: oof butler fight   
Ciel: Sebastian doesn’t do anything I don’t order him too   
Lizzie: wait even go to the bathroom?  
Sebastian: i would never   
Sebastian: you people are disgusting   
Sebastian: i have no need to do such a thing thank you very much  
Sebastian: my time is devoted to my master  
Ciel: forever you hoe   
Sebastian: yes forever  
Ciel: good  
Ciel:  
Ciel: bitch   
Grell: back off he’s MY bitch  
Alois: whomst the fuck  
Lizzie: why do I know no one in this chat room :,(  
Alois: BECAUSE YOU A GOLD DIGGING HOE  
Ciel: she gonna cut u up   
Grell: this chat is my reality tv  
Grell: those other bois   
Grell: they don’t get me  
Grell: they don’t like my chainsaw   
Grell: but bassy does~  
Sebastian: ew you nasty   
Sebastian: I’m gonna get some liquor  
Ciel: dude we can’t get drunk tho  
Sebastian: we can try my lord  
Lizzie: HE IS A MINOR  
Lizzie: DONT FEED MY LOVE ALCOHOL :’(  
Ciel: too late  
Ciel: im gonna drink my feelings away   
Undertaker: wait you have those? lol  
Lizzie: of course  
Ciel: no   
Ciel: shut up  
Ciel: Sebastian how much do I need to drink to get drunk  
Sebastian: you can’t  
Sebastian: i can’t   
Sebastian:   
Sebastian: cheers   
Alois: Claude I want to get drunk with Sebastian and Ciel!  
Claude: you can’t  
Claude: you’re a minor  
Alois: :(  
Alois: WAIT CIEL IS LIKE 9  
Ciel: IM 14 YOU HOOLIGAN   
Claude: well ciel’s Butler is different than mine and I say no   
Claude: And ciel has special circumstances   
Alois: oof  
Alois: am I special too Claude?  
Claude: ur very special  
Alois: thank u Claude   
Alois: THEN GIVE ME THE LIQUOR AND GET ME SOME HOOKERS  
Claude: omg pls  
Alois: THATS AN ORDER CLAUDE  
Alois: ciel im inviting you to my hooker party >:3  
Ciel: no   
Ciel: im too busy with my liquor party  
Finny: young master may we have some too :3?  
Ciel: sure why not  
Ciel: actually only you   
Ciel: And mey rin  
Ciel: And snake   
Ciel: And night one else  
Ciel: i think I can trust you not to burn the house down   
Bard: hey wait  
Alois: ciel im coming to visit  
Ciel: No keep ur booty shorts away from me  
Alois: Stop insulting them!!! They’re very sexy!  
Ciel: you’re a child  
Alois: so are you!  
Ciel: no  
Ciel: you made the fucking deal don’t u remember  
Alois: oh  
Alois: oh THAT deal  
Ciel: And HOW did you forget such an important event as THAT,..?  
Alois: bitch  
Alois: you think I wanna remember your ugly face  
Ciel: YOU ARE TEXTING ME, ALOIS  
Ciel: YOURE NOT TAKING ANY STEPS TO FORGET ME  
Lizzie: I don’t really know what’s happening here but please don’t fight Ciel!!!  
Ciel: too late ima kill him  
Ciel: Sebastian gimme a fork I’ll stab him   
Sebastian: hey wait that’s my thing   
Alois: yayyyy! Ur coming to my hooker party!!!  
Ciel: on second thought I’ll wait  
Grell: this drama is dumb  
Grell: it’s just you two bickering   
Grell: gimme some real fucking excitement   
Sebastian: well I have some tea to spill  
Sebastian: Claude is a fucking awful butler  
Sebastian: He got dust everywhere bitch  
Sebastian: There was a speck of dirt on the plate   
Claude: oh your one to talk  
Sebastian: And he doesn’t use proper grammar. (*You’re, Claude.)  
Alois: CLAUDE BE BETTER  
Claude: You dont have to screech it  
Alois: I’m having a fantastic time at MY hooker party  
Alois: MINE  
Alois:not yours  
Grell: if only madam red was still alive… we could go kill those hookers together...  
Lizzie: please don’t joke about her!!! I miss her!!!   
Grell: oh you don’t know  
Ciel: she doesn’t know lol  
Sebastian: I would highly reccomend not telling her  
Grell: for a price~  
Sebastian: Fine I’ll do the booty pic  
Ciel: HAHAHAHA   
Ciel: YOURE TAKING BOOTY PICS  
Alois: I WANT THE BOOTY PICS  
Ciel: oh dear lord he’s taking booty pics  
Claude: the many stages of booty pics   
Mey Rin: master I have gotten bs wanna me show up t   
Finny: mey Rin ur drunk stop   
Mey Rin: YOI ARW TOO  
Bard: I DID THE THING ANYWAY   
Snake: hiss… says me  
Snake: I should get all my snakes phones   
Snake: or my phones snakes  
Ciel: i hereby ban myself from this chat for the time being goodbye


End file.
